PunkAssBlog.com

Embattled Tour de France winner Floyd Landis vowed on Monday to clear his name. “I have a new goal, to prove myself innocent,” Landis told ABC’s Good Morning America.
This might be difficult:
“If they want to prove him innocent from a scientific point of view, they will have to re-invent physiology,” Gerard Dine, a [...]

This is nice:

This is better:

I have long felt Bill Simmons jumped the shark — except when he’s talking about the NBA. It’s the only sport of the big 3 where his Boston team isn’t a contender, and thus the last one in which he’s kept a valuable, insightful, league-wide perspective that isn’t skewed to his guys.
Anyway, today he [...]

At long last, the Dallas Mavericks return to the comfy confines of American Airlines Center tonight, far from the gag-inducing claustrophobia of American Airlines Arena in Miami. The Mavericks are still on life support because of the casual thumping they put on the Heat in Big D in the first two games.
No [...]

The Colorado Rockies are a couple games over .500. Sadly, this is an improvement over recent seasons, the last five of which have seen them finish below (often well below) that mark.
Prompted by this, um, success, the organization has decided to reveal its secret formula: The Rockies like their boys battered and [...]

ALERT! ALERT! If you accidentally buy unofficial NBA gear, you’re lining the pockets of Osama bin Laden:
“We’ve found these people who produce counterfeit merchandise for the World Series are the same people who produce it for the NBA playoffs,” said Ayala Deutsch, chief intellectual property counsel for the National Basketball Association. “This [...]

Look at them dance. And look at them make silly faces while they do it:

You should really see the pic full-size to appreciate the goofiness, especially Stevie Nash down there on the right.

Below the fold, be sure to check out:
1) Avery Johnson demonstrating that the Mavs are equal opportunity groin punchers.
2) Steve and Dirk serenading someone painfully.
3) The corniest promo of all time.
If these don’t get you pumped up for the conference finals tonight, nothing will. Go Mavs.

We’re here on my living room couch with a running diary on the Spurs-Mavs game 5. If you ever wanted a window into the the gametime mania of a sports fan, here’s your look at one.
Going into the contest, I’ve been engaging in soothing pessism - the comforting feeling of assuming the worst. [...]

Everything you needed to know about the new Dallas Mavericks came in one play tonight. Michael Finley, now a Spur, took the ball to the hoop for a layup, only to be met by an airborne Jerry Stackhouse cleanly swatting the ball out of bounds. After the play, Stackhouse stood menacingly over Finley’s [...]

Partly because the dumber ones moved to the DC area, and partly because they are just that stupid, I’d like to take a moment to celebrate Houston Texans owner Bob McNair and his lap dog, team GM Charley Casserley, as the official State Morons of Texas. Put their pictures up next to the state [...]

First, check out this promo the Big 10 Conference ran during its televised basketball games this year:

Frankly, I’m stunned the suits from a stodgy conference like the rust-belt Big 10 would push an image that’s unabashedly cool on so many layers. First off, there’s no hip hop star with more credibility than Talib Kweli. [...]