Shorter Lee Siegel: You may think collapsible tophats are respectable but I say this to you; they are the very height of crassness, for with the collapsing of tophats, so goes the collapsing of western civilisation itself and the descent into anarchy such a thing entails! Where are my pants?
Not that he’s really pissed off that he’s an old fuddy duddy or anything.
My Favorite bit:
The baseball cap’s insinuation that life is a game with transparent rules gets to me. Also the insinuation that by wearing a baseball cap in inappropriate situations–like indoors–you have what it takes to break the rules and win the game. And I’m bothered by the herdlike nature of the baseball-cap trend mixed with its affectation of insouciance. The baseball-cap people want to have the lofty cool indifference of an aristocrat, yet their need to have it in the standard approved way makes them anything but cool and indifferent.
Ooooh-kay.
Baseball caps get in the way of headbutting people, and are thus sucky, but still, a deep complex pomo examination of the socio-philisophical implications of baseball cap wearers is suckier. A socio-historical examination of the Tee’s cultural place in society through time might have been interesting,but baseball caps? They’re basically Alternative toupees for baby boomers these days, any examination beyond that is just an act of serious shark jumping.
ETA: Point of note, complaining about bad hats during World Cup Season (when the Angles make the Hajj to the temporarily holy land of Germany) is just weird.
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