The background is thus: Just about a year ago, Lisa wrote a post, a guide to getting rid of feminism (by ending social injustice). She observed that men, as a group, are in a particularly strong position to end sexual predation, since it’s such a gendered form of oppression. Her post was linked from an MRA site, so it caught the attention of a number of trolls. Most, I presume, slunk off when the safe space comment policy led to them being silenced! Muzzled! And… Censored! But one of them really went the extra mile.
I recently discovered a hitherto unread email from one of these trolls. It was like Christmas! I’m not as into writing posts like this—you mean there’s sexism? On the Internet?!—but today, just for you, I have extracted the sweet nectar from his e-mail and shall now present my findings: a detailed description of the Concerned Troll Style art.
All Targets Open Approach
Type: Reflexive
Duration: Instant
Keywords: Combo-OK
Prerequisite Charms: None
This fellow found my response to Lisa’s post, and decided that though I didn’t entirely agree with her, though my post was about different parts of the problem and different responses to it, it was, y’know, close enough.
Starting Strong and Starting Wrong Technique
Type: Simple
Duration: Instant
Keywords: Combo-OK, Obvious
Prerequisite Charms: None
Men-in-toto (that means “mean all together as a group”) are no more responsible for sexual predation than Germans-in-toto are responsible for Nazism.
Usually, I think patronizingly defining English terms is a strong move for a troll. In this instance, however, I think it actually works against his “nearly reasonable” offensive strategy, distracting from an otherwise pithy opener. And what an opener! It scans quite nicely, and though it flirts with point-blank Godwinization, I think it deftly avoids it. The structure is almost nice enough to make you miss that it’s made out of bullshit.
Because, see, the Germans in toto do bear responsibility for Nazism and the resultant horrors. The last fifty-odd years of German culture can be neatly described as the German people coming to grips with those horrors, their complicity therewith, and their responsibility to the survivors. Few think this sense of responsibility is misplaced.
Imposition of the Authority of Self
Type: Reflexive
Duration: Scene
Keywords: Combo-OK, Obvious
Prerequisite Charms: All Targets Open Approach, Starting Strong and Starting Wrong Technique
This is a particularly bold (and thus good!) move if even a cursory examination of the post you’re responding to would reveal said authority to be lacking in the eyes of your target audience. For example:
As someone who works in law enforcement…
Elementary Logic Kata
Type: Simple
Duration: Instant
Keywords: Combo-OK
Prerequisite Charms: Invocation of Authority Approach
This is a trickier technique, but well worth it if you can make it work. First, you must identify a passage of your post as “elementary logic”, ideally elementary logic that your opponent cannot—or in a longer exchange, refuses to—answer:
Likewise, you have no response to following argument, which is elementary logic:
Ah, there we go. Next, you have two options: You can, yourself, present an invalid or unsound argument, or you can present an argument that has little no bearing on the topic of discussion:
If men are responsible for sexual predation because most sexual predators are men, then African-Americans are responsible for violent crime because most violent criminals are African-American.
A daring move! Our troll has decided to go both ways, presenting an unsound argument—consider, “If whalers are responsible for a drop in humpback populations because most humpbacks are killed by whalers, then African-Americans are responsible for violent crime because most violent criminals are African-American”—that has nothing to do with anything Lisa or I wrote, and indeed, is something Lisa in particular took care not to say.
Revelation of the Soul
Type: Reflexive
Duration: Instant
Keywords: Combo-OK
Prerequisite Charms: Invocation of Authority Approach
At some point, without at least a few drops of barely-concealed, mouth-frothing anger, your rant won’t deliver the punch it needs to get through.
I tend to subscribe to the theory that women don’t commit violent crimes because they can find men to do the dirty work for them. But I’m a cynic.
Ah, ah, ah—I think he’s searching for a different word. Still, a noble effort, particularly given how it nicely bisects his previous his previous claim to nobility:
I was dating this girl once. As soon as we started dating she quit her job and started living off my paycheck. So I dumped her. You know what I didn’t do? I didn’t then leap to the conclusion that because this one woman was only into me because of my wallet, women are responsible for making men feel like we’re only valued for what we can give women.
Of course he didn’t. What a guy!
Your Heart is My Heart Prana
Type: Simple
Duration: Instant
Keywords: Combo-OK
Prerequisite Charms: Revelation of the Soul
My department budgets tens of thousands of dollars to run anti-rape campaigns on the local college campuses, despite the fact that almost no rapes occur there, and we spend almost no money on rape relief in the poverty-ridden neighborhoods where most of the rapes actually occur. … Frankly, I don’t think you really know much of anything about rape. Which I find really problematic. Don’t get me wrong, I know many committed feminists that are really doing things about rape — running shelters, working as prosecutors, providing counseling, serving in law enforcement — but nobody ever hears from them. Instead, people hear from people like you: people who are ideological, ignorant, and counter-productive.
Now, this in particular is interesting, because I do think that white feminism—along with white law enforcement—is responsible for ignoring women and communities of color. And I think relying on white patriarchal institutions—like, say, law enforcement and the criminal justice system—to “save” women is particularly unlikely to be helpful. I even wrote as much.
It’s highly unlikely he read that, of course, but this nevertheless demonstrates an important principle of Concerned Troll Style. In order to create the illusion that you actually care about the subject at hand, you should find some aspect of critique that your target will agree with, mention that aspect in passing, and then use the resulting confusion to assert that your target knows nothing—while you, of course, know everything.
I Like Shitty RPGs Form
Type: Simple
Duration: Scene
Keywords: Obvious, Furry-OK
Prerequisite Charms: Your Heart Is My Heart Prana, Elementary Logic Kata
A Fan of Gary Gygax (R.I.P.)
Alright then.
(wipes away the tears) You totally made my day. And yes, I get the joke with the format. <3
I usually lurk here, but Oh. My. God. This wins the Internet so hard I had to delurk to say so.
Especially with the slow reveal in the small window of my RSS reader. Until I hit ‘…kata” I had no idea what I was in for.
This is so beautiful.
Exalted on Punkassblog? My existence is validated.
I almost feel like we should stat these up. I don’t have a super-great sense for 2nd ed combat dynamics, though.
(Maybe it should be a Shaping art, so as to not make other players want to stab whoever’s using it. Also: pun.)
p.s. @Jaka Your blog is super-cute.
Most of the Second Edition Charms were copy-pasted from First Edition. The stats would be about the same.
The most important things about 2E combat are that initiative matters less and attack/weapon speed matters more. This has little effect on the charms except those that deal with initiative.
But aren’t there, like, DV penalties and tick durations and stuff? That was the big thing, for me. “Why are these DV penalties so high?” “They’re high?”
Ah, I forgot about DV penalties. This is one of the reasons I run First Edition.
BTW I think your “I like shitty RPGs” joke is misplaced. Yes, D&D is an arthritic dinosaur, and now with 4th edition it’s a mutated mess. But it was the first, at least the first big one. It got the hobby started and for that I think Gygax deserves props.