Which means it took me like six fucking hours to shop for a proper* “going to a conference, gonna be on stage” outfit. Even the military-inspired shit had ruffles all over the damn chest. Come on, department stores, just because something is trendy doesn’t mean it has to be all you stock!
*And by proper, I mean just slightly inappropriate. Gotta be me.
It drives me nuts how stores stock “trendy” stuff, and nothing but. First and foremost, maybe I don’t want to be trendy; maybe I want to wear clothes that look good on me and I enjoy. Second, in the places I shop, (Target, JCPenny’s, et cetera) you’re already behind “trendy” anyway.
Also, I’m too fat for the regular women’s clothes but not fat enough for the “Woman” section. Is it too much to ask for one shirt that fits both the boobs and the waist?
They do this with different cuts, too. I was looking for a pair of casual pants for a conference last fall (khaki/twill type things, just something a bit nicer than my, ahem, broken-in jeans). There were none that even remotely fit my body shape, because they were all the same low-waisted round-hipped cinched-at-the-knee shape that looks less professional on me than the aforementioned well-loved jeans.
Omg. Not ruffles, please. The only thing that looks worse on me is shoulderpads.
And peasant tops, which will not go away. Or those cross-topped, cinched under the boobs tops that kind of puff out at the waist? Who is wearing those? I see them on pictures of plus-sized models all the time, looking flattering and fun, and then when I put them on I look like a pregnant woman who is smuggling baked potatoes in her bra.
I eventually found a skirt at Jones New York outlet store, but my budget is not such that will accommodate tailored blazers yet, even at 75% off. I couldn’t find a decent top to go with it that I was willing to pay for, and eventually found a dress that would work at H&M, H and fucking M.
Okay, I misspoke–worse than both ruffles and shoulderpads are cinched-under-the-boobs tops. The only people who can wear those and look halfway decent in them are the incredibly skinny. The rest of us appear to have instantly gained 25 pounds, all of it around the waist.
I feel your pain. This ruffle trend has been going on at least since the fall, when I needed something to wear with a suit for interviews. Ruffled blouses do not equal appropriate interview attire, and all the otherwise tailored button-down shirts had these pleats and ruffles and crap everywhere. Proper Victorian style: do not want!
I have the same problem with sizing, Kyso. I’m just a bit too fat for the ‘regular’ clothes, but not quite fat enough for the ‘fat’ clothes. Seriously, I can’t be the only size 14 tall with hips in the entire fucking midwest, can I?
I spent the weekend trying to find a decent dress to wear to a wedding next month and was nearly reduced to tears. Everything either had ruffles, was made of that clingy jersey material (I have children, my stomach is *not* even remotely flat anymore, and it won’t ever be again, sans personal trainer, surgery, and about 4 extra hours per day), or was a halter top style that cannot be worn with a supportive bra and that makes my shoulders look so much flabbier than they are, or some combination thereof. Why can’t I find a nice, v-necked, a-line, pretty dress that shows off the small waist and hides the stomach? Why?
Jersey material, the cocktease of fabric! It looks and feels so fantastic on the hangar, then when it touches human skin, it become evil. I want to wear it, but it is cruel to the pudgy. The only thing good about being overweight was the enormous boobs that came with it, and they are truly fantastic. Not that jersey dresses care, they make everything look like balloons filled with wet flour.