For awhile now, I’ve been sort of working on a fantasy story that’s been percolating in my brain. I have always wanted to do fiction writing, but I’ve long been afraid of getting through the “you’re writing is going to suck” stage. The characters are loosely based on D & D game I once played in (not a unique strategy, to be sure, but can be an effective one).
If you’d like, I’d appreciate having a couple eyes going over it. Constructive criticism (and compliments) are always nice.
http://goddesscassandra.blogspot.com/2009/02/my-mom-thinks-im-talented-surely-you.html
*Sorry about the formatting glitch, my bad.
Lisa, you’re turn.
I will get back to you on this, Satan.
Hey, at the very least, it can’t be worse than mine
.
Okay, I’m gonna read yours, and then see if I can bear to share.
Oh, wow, does that take me back to my high school D&D-playing days or what…I liked it! It is a little stilted in the language but first chapters always are (at least my first chapters always are–the flow of the story doesn’t take hold right away for me). But I don’t have anywhere other than here to post one of my short stories and I am SO not doin’ that. Too SHY. WAY too shy.
Nuh-uh, fair’s fair. I’ve posted a chapter, it’s time for a short story.
I am having some problems with the conversations…I think my descriptions are fairly okay, but the conversations do feel…forced. I’m playing around with adding some accents, and maybe some different words.
I think accents are an excellent idea…also, I’ve found that if I actually say the dialogue aloud, it becomes a lot more clear to me what’s more awkward and what’s flowing more naturally. Luckily I have periods of time where nobody’s around to hear me do this.
But you didn’t put it up HERE! you just posted a link…I can’t do that…I’m too shy to post it here! ..any ideas how to get around this conundrum…
I could post it on my blog.
We could, if you didn’t mind sharing. I could email it to you and you could post it and put a link up here! But it is nearly 6000 words long so maybe I should just send you part of it…I know! Let’s see–your chapter looks about 3000 words long, maybe I could just send you the first 3000 words?
Email me
I’m so going to regret this.