If this is what counts as an “educational organization” in abstinence land, then hell yeah we need to stop giving them money. They’re just not that bright.
Published by Kyso Kisaen May 8th, 2008 in Punkass!, Edumakashun, HUH!?, Reproductive Rights, Sex, Wankers, What would we do without such great advice?Hi everybody! I’m sorry I haven’t been posting lately, not that y’all have noticed with our fantastic new bloggers filling the void I’d left behind. I took my last final ever today (squee!) and am gearing up to leave the country in a few weeks, so things have been a bit busy. And I was wondering, I should blog, but with my head stuffed full of MEMS manufacturing processes and phase diagrams, I haven’t had a moment to come up with an interesting thought about anything. What could I blog about?
Then Amanda gave me a present: the Abstinence Clearinghouse Blog. A treasure trove of easy target! Huzzah! Let’s check it out!
The Abstinence Clearinghouse is “a privately funded 501(c)3 non-profit, non-partisan international educational organization.” I hope they know alot about abstinence, because their bloggers don’t know jack squat about making an argument. Let’s start with Annie, author of the two of the first three posts on ACB. I don’t know much about Annie, because none of the bloggers write an introductory post, nor is there a bios page. The subject of Annie’s groundbreaking first post? The epidemic of teens taking nude photos of themselves with camera phones:
So teens are now using cell phones to take nude photos of themselves for general circulation. They have to know that once it’s out there, it’s really out there. That’s not just embarrassing–which it will be, sooner or later–it’s a little creepy when you think about who might be looking…and why.
I’m not sure what I like best about this post; the conversational opening, the lack of a link to anything explaining this phenomena to those of us who have never gotten a clear, much less titillating, picture out of a camera phone, or the scare ellipses. What nefarious reasons could a stranger have for looking at an anonymous picture of your nude body? Annie was just warming up, though. In her second post, “Planned Parenthood seeking 1 Million Opponents to Abstinence” she really shines.
On April 29th, Planned Parenthood sent out an email calling out to its supporters to join them in challenging Presidential candidates to talk about sex…They are asking for 1 Million “strong, caring, fed-up people who aren’t afraid to talk about sex,” to sign onto their letter by November 4th this year.
You see, this is what is wrong with the teens today.
Of course I see. How could I not see that the Planned Parenthood One Million Strong campaign to “elect pro-choice candidates at every level, including a pro-choice president and Senate and House members; pass laws and policies that support women’s health; defeat anti-choice ballot measures; and turn out one million pro-choice voters in November 2008!” is exactly what is wrong with kids these days. ( I assume Annie is talking about the 1 Million Strong campaign, as it is the only thing on PP’s website with that number associated with it. Annie, being a crackerjack debater, didn’t provide any supporting quotes from the email or links or anything crazy like that.) When I think of today’s youth with their hip-hop music, their Hannah Montana and their grassroots political actions for women’s health and reproductive choice, I wish we could return to a simpler time.
But I’m not being fair to Annie. She didn’t mean the 1 Million Strong campaign was what was wrong with kids these days, she merely objects to Planned Parenthood’s ceaseless marketing of venereal disease as sexy.
Planned Parenthood (and everyone else they have in their pocket) talks about sex, all the time, every corner you turn, every magazine cover, music, internet….you can’t get away from the descriptive images of sex.
She’s right you know. From Planned P Records to their publishing of Vanity Fair, Planned Parenthood has waged a relentless war to sex up our lives. I can’t tell you how much their magazine articles (”5 Sizzling Ways to Pass the Time Waiting for that Herpes Outbreak to Subside” “Abortion: Can Today’s Woman Afford NOT to Have One?”) have changed my life. Thanks to Planned Parenthood’s educational efforts and efforts to bring preventative gynological care to low-income women, I can’t turn on my TV or surf the internet or even check my spam folder without being reminded of sex. And we know that their lush, tantalizing description of forbidden sexual acts will do nothing for abstinence should they ever be allowed to present their case to Congress.
Kids have very little concept of what healthy relationships look like. If they don’t see it at home, they are almost guaranteed NOT to see it anywhere else, accept in abstinence education courses which are so far outfunded by contraceptive programs its ridiculous.
Psst: Annie, since your last statement implies there’s some numbers attached to it, that would have been a good place to put a link to your evidence. Here, let me show you how: Some people disagree with your assertion that abstinence programs model a “healthy relationship.”
I guess Planned Parenthood is getting exactly what they want: more failed contraception causing more unwed pregnancies to abort (more money) and more STD’s to treat.
You know what costs more than providing an abortion and treating an STD? Delivering a baby. The Planned Parenthood in my town doesn’t provide abortions, they provide standard preventative care and referrals. The people providing the abortions offer far more expensive services that insurance is more likely to cover if only that woman would carry to term. I assume they don’t look at every patient with dollar signs in their eyes, however. They’re OB-GYNs, not monsters.
Oh, jeez, that was fun. And that was just the third post on the whole blog! We haven’t gotten to the advice dispensed by “HotMamma247″ (she makes waiting hot!) or Kayla, and her assertion that because some Canadian law enforcement officials feel that passing free crack pipes to addicts is a bad policy, we shouldn’t give condoms to children, vulnerable with “partially developed brains.” Also, I’m dying to know more about “ULTRA Teen Choice” and what caused it to be “unfairly” expelled from the DC school system. Since the rest of the ACB posters are insightful, reasonable people who are clearly experts on the subject of sex and abstinence and aren’t at all insane or ill informed, I can only trust that Richard Urban’s anger against unjust DC school administrators is reasonable and that his ULTRA Teen Choice program indeed provided “medically accurate” information in the name of providing teens with the right to choose abstinence.
Jesus Christ on a crutch, how many millions in abstinence based education in the last decade and this is the caliber of thought they give us? I want my damn taxes back. ACB, the global gag rule is killing people in Africa. Your pledges don’t work. You provided only platitudes and no real solid results. You can’t afford to layer this joke of a blog on top of that. Seriously. Be smarter.
I am all about manufacturing processes and phase diagrams. Bring ‘em on! Wanna hear all about lean six sigma in return?? (say “NO”)
My second favorite quote from their website: “For many a young woman, the first confirmation of pregnancy takes place at home as she anxiously studies the little strip that comes with her EPT, or early pregnancy test. Now, for far too many, the same mom-to-be may be returning to the drug store for another home test-this time to determine the father of her child.”
Yes, it’s hard for us nonabstinent women to keep track of all the men we screw at our nightly gangbangs and orgies, every single one of them without protection. VERY common issue for us.
Wait, wait. Home test to determine the father of her child? These exist?? Or are they demonstrating another aspect of their ignorance?
Isn’t EPT a brand name, not really a technical acronym that need explaining?
I know, it’s nitpicking. But they’re so fucking biased (one of the major things I forgot to include in the post, but most readers will figure it out, is that PP is NOT in fact seeking people who are against abstinence in any way. Abstinence-only education, maybe, but certainly not people who are simply against teens waiting for sex. But that didn’t stop Annie from making that conflation the title of her post)
Anyway, so fucking biased that I feel every little bizarre tic that every poster has that displays his or her complete lack of thought should be picked on. Ok, I’m chock full o’ biases too, but at least I don’t claim to be an educational clearing house.
Holy crap, I made a mistake, this blog is over 3 years old. I just hit the last button until I seemed to run out of posts; and look at the thing, it looks so new.
Damn.
I love the review of “The Abstinence Teacher.” Clearly, blogger Theresa did not read “The Little Children” or see the film.
Then there’s this gem: “it is best read by someone who is willing to exert some mental energy in order to fully appreciate the complexities of the characters.”
Thanks for the warning, I wouldn’t want my head to explode from unexpected cognitive activity.
Well, they would probably use it as jack off material, and I guess many people wouldn’t like that for various reasons. Maybe this isn’t such a terrible thing. But, as Anna wrote in her post, those pictures could be used to blackmail, expose, or humiliate a person. Imagine your co-workers have seen a few nude pictures of yourself. A lot of very unpleasant things could result. I would certainly not want any ex girlfriend to publish any pictures of me, risqué or not, on the internet (and as a man, I don’t have half as much to be afraid of as any woman in the same situation).
I really don’t see what is wrong with Anna’s post (no idea if Annie and Anna are the same person). Ok, the post reads as if she just jotted down a fleeting thought. She could have elaborated a bit, mentioned the risks of putting any personal information online, e. g. on facebook, but basically she is right - you can’t unpublish what is once out in the internet, and you want to be careful.
No, I agree that it’s a bad idea to have naked images of yourself floating around the internet. However, this isn’t Annie’s Musings at Blogspot; this is a site that claims it will be a clearinghouse for abstinence education materials and resources. You can’t start with the non-sequitor of “So kids these days and they’re naked photos” without showing that this is actually a problem. Did she read an article about a girl who got in trouble when her boyfriend blackmailed her? Is this something that happened to a friend of a friend? What the hell is the context. For that matter, who are Annie and Hotmamma247 and Kayla, and why are they qualified to be the self-appointed official bloggers of abstinence?
I’m flat out underwhelmed by these guys and their blog, and not pleased by the arguing in bad faith that shows up in the posts that are more than fleeting thoughts. Annie does not get the benefit of the doubt. None of them do.
They think there’s an OTC paternity test?! Hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahaha. You pee on a stick, and it says “Bob Smith,” since your name is inscribed on your DNA by baby Jesus himself.
I look forward to a world full of amateur forensic specialists.
Will that be when lynch mobs replace today’s courts? And the drunk next door will use his DIY surgeon’s kit to stitch up the survivors.
Shudder…
By the way, they closed the comments for all their posts and deleted all critical comments, leaving only comments they liked (e. g. yoshi3329’s comment on Another Reason for Abstinence). There is no hint about this little cleansing action on the blog, and they didn’t notify the people whose comments they deleted (they could have because one had to register to be allowed to comment, and the e-mail was verified on registration).
I noticed. They’ve been light on the posts too, except for HotMamma’s pearls of wisdom.
I looked up ULTRA teen choice, too. Seems like they got booted from DC schools because of some non-discrimination program requirement, i.e. they are not down with the whole concept of gay, and DC schools want to require that they not be jerks about it.