Doesn’t it go against everything Prairie Muffins stand for to spend $18.99 on a tacky, unflattering t-shirt?
Published by Kyso Kisaen December 16th, 2007 in Punkass!, Godbaggery, Family, Ze Goggles! Zey Do Nothing!The continuity of shirt slogans at the Christian CafePress store goes from:
cute & tacky:
to cute, not as tacky:
to needlessly defensive, tacky & dated:
to needlessly defensive, tacky, but timeless:
to ummmm…..
to respectfully submitted without comment:
Anyone care to top “Militant Fecundity”?
“Victims” of feminism: rapists, wife-beaters, assorted misogynist, FGM proponents, men who treat their wives like servants except without the pay, sexually selfish men, child abusers.
Indeed, it’s a good thing not to be a “victim” of feminism, but I suppose the T-shirt makers mean something more like, “I will continue the behaviors that feminists disapprove of (rape, wife-beating, declaring the female orgasm a myth, firing women for getting pregnant) and will pretend to be proud of being such a terrible person rather than give up my attachment to evil.”
I was going to suggest something simple and classy like ‘Breeder’ or ‘Broodmare’ to top ‘Militant Fecundity’ but then I realized that professional breeders of livestock know better than to mate an animal every single year till it drops dead. Apparently those ‘quiverfull’ bastards care less for their ’stock’ than even a breeder of purebred horses.
I once received a response to one of my posts that floored me. It was, “You are wrong. I saw it on 700 Club.”
Alright.
I love the “I heart obeying my husband” one especially. I think whoever buys this one should also buy a “i refuse to be a victim of feminism” buttom and wear the two together… Then i want this person to be a role model for my future children. Awesome…
Who the hell comes up with this stuff?
They might as well wear a shirt that says “I enjoy the status quo and progressive change that may actually make my life more fulfulling terrifies me”
Wait, that may not fit on a shirt…
Maybe we can put that slogan on a pair of panties instead?
“Militant Fecundity”? Babies don’t come out THAT fast.
But I’ll try to top it. Will “Helpmeet in Training” do? Or “Helpmeet”, period? A whole concept based on what might simply be a mistranslation?*
*The word used about Eve in Genesis 1 is later used to refer to the Holy Spirit. I like to think that the passage in Genesis means sth like, God looked at Adam and went “holy cow - this guy needs help!”
Sorry, Schrodinger, but both of those options are already available on the site. You can also get “Patriarch” and “Patriarch in Training” shirts, so the whole family can match!
i would like to see an “i’m with patriarch” tee… you know, with an arrow pointing to the left…
Everyone knows a Patriarch can never have too many servants, so Militant fecundity because Happiness is my big family.
Ailey, a purebred horse costs a lot of money, and you want to protect that investment, don’t you? If, on the other hand, one has worn out one wife, one can always get another for free, so why bother to treat them decently? And by the time she drops dead the oldest daughters will be able to do the house work, so that is no problem either.
Why not print ASSEMBLY LINE over a semi-transparent picture of a baby? Or Churning out babies for [insert deity/national leader of choice]; Production so far: [insert number].
http://www.cafepress.com/burgerbrown.49632790
Useful.