You think you know Roe?
Published by Kyso Kisaen December 12th, 2007 in Fetii, Godbaggery, Reproductive Rights, Rights? What rights?Some mystery organization, which only wants us to know the truth, has put out a handy-dandy Roe V Wade IQ test, 12 simple questions designed to test your knowledge of the 1973 Roe V Wade judgment. Alternately, this quiz will also test your understanding of what exactly judges do when they issue a ruling. For example, question 6 asks:
6) At what age does Roe require minor girls to have parental notification before an abortion?
Parental notification is not required
Girls 18 and younger
Girls 16 and younger
Girls 13 and younger
Picking answer 1 shows that not only do you know Roe, you are also probably aware that the question of if minors require parental notification before getting an abortion was not included in the Roe v Wade case, and that lawyers for both sides, only having a half an hour to actually make a case, probably stuck to the issue at hand. Roe was over 18 when she tried to get that abortion, and the Supreme Court is more famous for refusing to hear cases than for randomly throwing extraneous legal issues into the ones they do hear.
Question 9:
9) Which of our nation’s founding documents contains the phrase “right to an abortion”?
Declaration of Independence
U.S. Constitution
Bill of Rights
None of the Above
All of the Above
It’s true that every last right we have is enumerated in great detail in the Bill of Rights, which is actually 50,423 pages long and explicitly states that if it’s not in there, you ain’t got a right to it. This is why the Supreme Court has to make up work for itself; everything is so clearly written out that there is no need for a court devoted entirely to Constitutional matters.
Question 12:
12) Under Roe, which of these are allowed to perform abortions?
Licensed physician
Nurse practitioner
Resident assistant
Registered nurse
All of the above
And hidden question 13:
If Roe wasn’t keeping states from banning abortions outright, which of the following would you find performing abortions in areas where it was illegal?
Doctors, if you can find one
Nurses, ditto
Midwives, ditto
That woman that that woman in your sister’s office heard about
The pregnant woman herself, via something she read on the internet that she hopes is true
The pregnant woman’s boyfriend, via blunt force trauma
Fake doctors who will fill the void as options one through three are thrown in jail
Abortions will actually disappear, being replaced by abandonment and/or infanticide, which will offer a lower maternal death rate than coat hanger abortions
Just joshin’ - there is no question 13.
“9) Which of our nation’s founding documents contains the phrase “right to an abortion”?”
Must be the same one that contains the phrase “America is a Christian nation, founded upon Christian principles,” or “flag-burning is forbidden,” or “torture is okay, as long as citizens never know about it.”
Those clever bastards. I was seriously thinking that it was a relatively unbiased quiz until the last page, where they ask if you want to be put on mailing lists for the most vile and hateful fundie Christian organizations like Focus on the Family and CWA. The profiling questions they ask should’ve tipped me off though: they’re going to use this “study” to bawl about how all college educated librul atheists are baby murderers. Or something.
12) Under Roe, which of these are allowed to perform abortions?
Licensed physician
Nurse practitioner
Resident assistant
Registered nurse
All of the above
This question and its “answer” make no sense. Their answer is “all of the above” because “Roe does not specify who can or cannot perform abortions.” However, from the decision itself:
The State may define the term “physician,” … to mean only a physician currently licensed by the State, and may proscribe any abortion by a person who is not a physician as so defined.
So no, Roe doesn’t directly prohibit a nurse from performing the procedure, in the same way it doesn’t permit a lawyer from performing an appendectomy.
Additional answers to question 13:
Women won’t be having abortions at all, because they won’t be corrupted by evil liberal brainwashers who hate God and babies
Women will forget that abortion ever existed and decide they’d rather stay home serving their husbands instead of competing with men for jobs, America will become a Christian nation once more, and Jesus will finally show up at my house for beers
Sure, those are the right answers to those who wrote the quiz, but unfortunately for them reality has a well-known liberal bias.
I got 11/12. And I think that the stupid quiz highlights the underlying stupid of letting a vital bedrock of civilised society (which is what legal abortion is) rest on case law alone. But hey, it’s not my country. Until I move there. In January. Shit. :/
“It’s true that every last right we have is enumerated in great detail in the Bill of Rights, which is actually 50,423 pages long and explicitly states that if it’s not in there, you ain’t got a right to it. This is why the Supreme Court has to make up work for itself; everything is so clearly written out that there is no need for a court devoted entirely to Constitutional matters.”
Beautifully said. I intend to paraphrase as I must and use it against every one of the nine million times this “rights” meme comes up among the brainwashed that I must associate with.
What disturbs me most about these people is that they wear the mantle of High Ethics and Morals and yet have absolutely no problem lying to people and taking advantage of their ignorance in the most malicious, legal ways possible. It is vile.