Why do conservatives hate penguins?
Published by Sabotabby October 2nd, 2007 in Books, Family, Teh Gay
Nefarious agents of the homosexual agenda.
I post about penguins probably more often than I should, but they’re terribly cute, and for whatever reason, they seem to get used as political footballs far more often than the poor things deserve.
Well, it’s happening again. The most challenged book of 2006, according to the Chicago-based American Library Association, was And Tango Makes Three. I haven’t read it, but it sounds cute: A zookeeper gives two penguins a fertilized egg, it hatches, and they raise the little penguin chick as their own. Aww. Penguins.
I bet you can guess why conservatives don’t like this book.
“The huge majority of parents would avoid this book if they knew it was brainwashing their children to support and experiment with homosexual behavior,” said Randy Thomasson, president of the California-based Campaign for Children and Families.
That argument might be more convincing were it not for the documented existence of gay penguins. Better keep those kids away from zoos as well.
You know, I always wonder about people who go on book-banning campaigns. With all the good causes out there, why expend that sort of energy to make yourself into the kind of laughing stock that tries to get a picture book about penguins pulled from libraries?
Yay a new book to ‘brainwash my child to support and experiment with homosexual behavior’. I’m putting this one the list o’ books to buy before the little buddy is born, along with all those other books made so well known by conservatives blathering on about how ‘teh homosexual agenda is subverting the children!!1!!1ZOMG!’
Sometimes I contemplate sending them a thank you note for alerting me to all these wonderful books that I might never have known about otherwise. I doubt they would get the joke though.
Kids, first the read about it in a book, then the next thing you know they’re living on an ice shelf adopting abandoned penguin chicks.
Unless the first third of the book is two befuddled and confused penguins who just keep doing it and doing it hoping for that egg until it becomes a chore - wait, even that sounds like it kind of sucks, and probably would work to discourage experimentation of any kind. I am simply not seeing the sexy here.
I love Tango! My kid likes it too, although since she has already been thoroughly brainwashed into the homosexual agenda, the book is just rainbow icing on a big gay cake.
the sad news is that apparently, after Tango grew up and left the nest, Roy (or was it Silo??) abandoned his partner in favor of a girl penguin.
Damn bi-sexuals.
Conservatives should hate penguins because they don’t have enough sexual dimorphism. How are they supposed to know what is what and obey their gawd-given gender roles??* Damn homosexin’ penguins.
*now i’m reminded of that great gary larson cartoon with the jellyfish bathrooms.
So if kids read “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” are they going to try and pupate?