The world hates on my package
Published by punkass marc July 16th, 2007 in Cock!, Shame on you for being a womanI was scratching my crotch the other day (because it’s the manly thing to do when idle), and the checkout clerk freaked out on me because she said the attention I was drawing to my bulge was preventing her from doing her job.
Earlier last week, I was sitting in a movie theater with my hand halfway down my pants for comfort, and the chick sitting next to me said I needed to get it out of there because she couldn’t think about the movie with so much distraction emanating from my cock-tal region.
Sometimes when I wear boxers and khaki slacks, “snake and the boys” jangle freely. The waitress at my favorite bar said that I wasn’t allowed to leave my stool unless I taped them down because whenever I got up to pee, she spilled her tray thinking about my jewels.
Seriously. Those things totally happened.
Would I lie?
Okay, you got me. None of those things happened. If I were to scratch my crotch in public, no one would say anything. If I jammed my hand halfway down my pants while relaxing in public, folks wouldn’t notice or mind. And if I had the gall to let my junk warble around in boxers and loose pants, I wouldn’t catch a bit of flak.
But if I had boobs and dared to take them out in public? That’d be a whole different story.
10 Responses to “The world hates on my package”
- 1 Pingback on Jul 20th, 2007 at 11:45 am
Nothing I could say here would come across right.
Just thinking about your balls is making it hard to finish this comment. To the back of the bus you go, sir.
See? I’m cursed with these gorgeous things.
GRRRRRR.
marc, have you ever looked into LPSG? there is help for men like you and me.
Actually, I have a very small penis. But my balls are the size of grapefruits.
You should really see a doctor about that.
you’ve inspired me to write about packages: http://yellowisthecolor.wordpress.com/2007/07/20/obamas-package-on-c-span2/
hooray for my inspirational package!