Lady lawyers anger Patriarchy despite prominent display of boobs
Published by punkass marc May 9th, 2007 in Shame on you for being a womanIt’s a poorly kept secret that the easiest way to distract the Patriarchy is to flash some cleavage. Unfortunately, that method isn’t entirely foolproof.
In Chicago, an all-female legal firm rocked the moral foundation of the universe by placing this billboard above a happening singles bar area:
Normally, advertising featuring a gravity-defying rack like that would satisfy the Patriarchs, but the billboard commits 2 cardinal sins against maledom:
1) It shows an equally artifically hot manbody
There are a million reasons this is never okay. First, it implies men might also be held to some absurdly unreachable standard of beauty, and we’re too busy eating mozzarella sticks to compete with that. Plus, bodily shame is the HPV of esteem issues. It’s been successfully quarantined amongst the ladies, and guys are _not_ down with it mutating into something we can catch. Second, the ad implies women might also pursue sex as an end unto itself. This threatens the universally accepted definition of sex as “stuff you to do stimulate a penis until it comes.” Once you add (or *gasp* replace “penis” with) woman-parts like the clitoris, you create chaos from order. [Astute males should also be questioning whether there actually IS a clitoris. Even the name sounds more like an elf queen from Lord of the Rings than a real body part.] There are other reasons this sucks, but I’m sure I’ve scared you enough already.
2) It denies the sanctity of marriage
Patriarchy rule #8: The whole thing hinges on chicks spending their entire lives wanting nothing more than to be married and have our babies, so thou shalt not fucketh with that. And yet here we have some Ally McBeal wannabes daring to promote the idea that you don’t have to be, and maybe even shouldn’t be, married to enjoy life to its fullest.
Frank admisssion: If #1 hadn’t happened, #2 wouldn’t be that big of a deal. If the sign just had tits on it, the message would’ve been targeted at guys alone. That would’ve made it a humorous wink-nod-nudge-fingergun to the fellas, reminding us that if we ever want a new concubine with sexxy saline implants, we can just sever ties with the old wench and bring in a new model. After all, boys will be boys.
See? Totally un-noteworthy.
But that masculine washboard stomach is there, creating the galling impression that women should be just as free to happily walk away from their marriage as men.
Check out how many men this pissed off:
“It’s grotesque,” said John Ducanto, past president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. “It’s totally undignified and offensive.”
…
“It trivializes divorce and I think it’s absolutely disgusting,” Rick Tivers, a clinical social worker at the Center for Divorce Recovery in Chicago, told ABC News.
…
“This has to be the Academy Award of bad taste,” Raoul Felder told ABC News.
Notice how strong their language is — “grotesque,” says one. “Disgusting,” says another. Those are pretty strong sentiments, all from males.
There was also at least one woman who voiced protest:
Karen Enright, president-elect of the Women’s Bar of Illinois, shared similar feelings. “It’s actually a disappointment to the profession and to the institution of marriage, which is something our community holds as sacred,” she said. “Our profession, and lawyers in general, have been under attack for advertisements similar to this and I think,” she said, pausing. “I think that it’s not in good taste.”
While it’s nice that Karen trumpeted the sanctity of marriage, I’m sure the Patriarchy will dock her points for not acting outraged enough. “Disappointment” and “not in good taste” pale in comparison to the statements of male outrage above.
Ultimately, the owners of the parking garage featuring the sign took it down despite being paid in full for the ad. Good soldiers for the Patriarchal cause, eh?
ABC also knows how to put uppity gals in their place. Along with claiming that she likes to “recycle catch phrases,” check out ABC’s subtle dig at female lawyer/ad-whore Corri Fetman:
“By the way, the male body on the billboard? That’s my personal trainer, Chuck Sanow,” Fetman told ABC News, her girlish voice rising just so. “He’s a Chicago firefighter and he owns a gym.”
You may be flaunting your undeserved sexual freedom, but you still sound like a girl when you do it.
Zing!
14 Responses to “Lady lawyers anger Patriarchy despite prominent display of boobs”
- 1 Pingback on Jul 15th, 2007 at 6:46 pm
I think that woman is pushing her boobs up with her arms.
“This has to be the Academy Award of bad taste,’’ Raoul Felder told ABC News.
Nah. Daytime Emmy at best, Raoul. Oscar material would go to the sign with two children torso’s with the caption ‘fuck kids.’ See, it’s clever, Rauol, because it’s like one of those double entourage things. It’s like, hmm… is this a pro-child molestation billboard, or is it a statement against the having/existence of children? Either way, bad taste abounds!
Good call, JasonC. I would also nominate parents dressing their kids in “God hates Fags” t-shirts for that Academy Award.
I nominate Prussian Blue.
Is it still sexist if the man has boobs too?
Methinks someone should listen to Opie and Anthony talk about raping Condi Rice and then we’ll reevaluated bad taste.
The manly man’s abs looks like something out of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
“Damnit, Donatello, what did I tell you about looking shiny? More oil!”
I realize it makes great blog grist, but the idea here is that family lawyers aren’t supposed to be encouraging divorce.
Agreed. Isn’t that something like one of those injurly lawyers encouraging you to drive drunk and blindfolded? I do, however, agree that marc’s beefcake-free version would not have attracted much attention.
mythago,
i totally disagree. i think it merely laughs in the face of marriage, which is basically laughing in the face of patriarchal horsepucky. works for me.
you’re welcome to get married and have a great marriage and what not, but i am all for dispensing with the holy sacred crap surrounding it.
I can see mythago’s point: divorce lawyers are among those who would have an ulterior motive to blaming the patriarchy here. Is it really laughing in the face of patriachal horsepucky if they can charge by the hour for it?
Now, the placement is another thing. It’s hanging over a popular clubbing area, which is a highly sexualized enviornment and an appropriate place for some tongue-in-cheek humor. It’s not like someone who is totally committed to their spouse but happens to be in the area is going to look at the sign and think, ‘oh, my god, they’re right!’ But if the jerk is already fooling around and headed for divorce, then why not put your name out there? Tasteless? Sure. Totally beyond the pale? Maybe if the ads were blanketing the city.
Sure, sure, but I’m all for anything that tears at the oppressive elements of our society. I realize these people may not have the motives of saints, but just because they could make a buck off it doesn’t make them wrong. And as an all-female law firm, I think there _is_ an element of “f*** you” towards the male institution of marriage, and I dig it.
My take was that divorce is a pretty painful experience so people going through it deserve their dark humor where they can get it.