PunkAssBlog.com

It’s sort of like a game of “Where’s Waldo” where the prize is a gag-inducing truth about our priorities.

Does this count as the first official “magazine-style” review of our site? I think it does!
I admit, AlphaBeta.com, a self-described “men’s lifestyle portal,” isn’t the first place I would’ve guessed I’d see a positive review of our site. Several of their articles send up the typical red flags associated with such communities (”how […]

A student near Pittsburgh spent 12 days in juvie hall because someone forgot to reset the clock on the caller ID.
Cody Webb was arrested last month, after Hempfield Area High School received a bomb threat on their student hotline…They believed they’d found the culprit when they traced the phone number they thought was responsible to […]

Mrs Alexandra over at Homeliving Helper knows that feminists are out to destroy Western civilization. And we’re doing it by causing women to ‘forget’ that we actually like having to stroke a guy’s ego for 40+ years just to get some of those precious, precious resources. Doing this creates two new problems: one […]

It turns out the Flash Gordon crew had nothing to worry about. Look what happened to Chris Clarke when he peeled off that male privilege and washed it down the sink. That’s what it’s often like when you’re a decent person because you want to be. For fuck’s sake, as long as you don’t tell […]

A year ago, I realized the blogosphere lacked a truly civilized hub of carefully qualified policy discussion. After considerable praying on what to do about it, God finally spoke to me. Well, not so much spoke to me as gave me a sign.
Kind of.
Because what happened was my middle […]

I’ve always been a fan of cocaine and the way it provides that extra boost that coffee just can’t while also keeping my lovehandles to a minimum, but it’s just so bad for the heart, you know? Luckily, energy drink maker Redux Beverages has heard my cry.
The Food and Drug Administration said Redux Beverages […]

File under “no doy:”
Students who took part in sexual abstinence programs were just as likely to have sex as those who did not, according to a study ordered by Congress.
Also, feel free to file this under “creepy old pervs,” as I’m a smidge uncomfortable with Congressional inquiries into teenage sexual habits. Maybe I’m still […]

If Ricky Bobby taught me one thing, it’s that America is for winners. You win, you reap the rewards. You lose, you deserve the kicking-to-the-curb that’s coming to you.
Don’t believe me? Just ask the US government, who’s knowingly taking advantage of soldiers so bad at their jobs they couldn’t keep […]

Female civil servants in the Indian government’s employ are a little miffed to find out that they work for a bunch of panty-sniffers.

Women civil servants in India have expressed shock at new appraisal rules which require them to reveal details of their menstrual cycles.
Under the new nationwide requirements, female officials also have to say when […]

Remember the DaVinci Code Diet? Well, fuck that Catholic-baiting calorie-control blasphemy. Why follow a diet based on heresy when God himself is waiting for you to pray those inches off of your fat ass?
Jordan Rubin is convinced God can help you lose weight. Rubin, author of The Maker’s Diet, is fresh from […]

I get a lot of t-shirts from threadless, and the shipping information gets sent to my gmail account, which means I get a lot of text ads for ‘funny t-shirt’ sites. So I clicked on the link today and at first, I was offended:

Ha ha, it’s funny because it’s about fetishizing […]