when the status quo frustrates.

Grind it up and put it in her coffee and presto! The perfect woman.

Monday, April 30th, 2007

All together now, feminist community:

What. The. Fuck?

Hope for sex-boost slimming pill

Around 40% of women are said to experience low libido at some point
Scientists are developing a pill which could boost women’s libido and reduce their appetite.

The hormone-releasing pill has so far only been given to female monkeys and shrews who displayed more mating behaviour and ate less.

I would like to extend my compliments to the BBC for giving more article space to the psychologist than to the to super-awesome diet pill aspects of the drug. Other publications will be unable to resist the temptation of emphasizing that science has created a pill that makes women thin and horny, and what could possibly be wrong with that?

Activity #6: Determine if every activity on the date is being used to armchair psychoanalyze you.

Sunday, April 29th, 2007

According to MSN’s five ways to scope out your date, my fiance and I do not love each other:

Activity #5: Go for a drive together
The next time your date offers to drive you somewhere, pay attention to how they react on the road. “Driving is very, very revealing,” says body language expert Patti Wood (pattiwood.net). “Years ago, I was on a first date with a man who’d turn left at yellow lights, and take lots of risks on the road. That told me he was a person who would always live a little on the edge.” Other insights from Wood: Lane-changers will probably always be on the lookout for someone better-looking, smarter, or richer than you. Picky parkers who always want to go around one more time to see if they can snag a closer spot probably have problems with commitment. Herky-jerky drivers who accelerate and brake so quickly they leave your stomach queasy may have poor sense of pacing in all areas of life. Plus, if you’re driving, see how they handle it—nagging that you should slow down, speed up, or otherwise do things differently is a sign this person probably won’t love you just the way you are (starting with your bad driving).

On the one hand, any time we drive together there is non-stop bitching from the passenger’s seat; each of us is convinced that the other will kill us with his/her reckless driving. On the other hand, while I have trouble committing to people, I will happily take the farthest, most isolated parking space in the lot.

Nevermind, then, I guess we’re OK. MSN, you suck!

Reading assignment

Saturday, April 28th, 2007

Those of you who are not regular readers of Twisty Faster will still want to pop on over for this one.

In such a society, where a woman is a member of the oppressed sex class, her performance of sex in a film which is then consumed by paying customers to satisfy their prurience, this is not even remotely a politically neutral act. Porn — gay, straight, bi, live-action, animated, or ‘feminist’ — is the graphic representation of the oppression of the sex class. Until the sex class is liberated from male oppression, porn can be nothing else, no matter how many fun feminists claim it empowerfuls them…

When you’re already oppressed, it is, in fact, impossible to volunteer for oppression. A woman is a member of the sex class whether she “chooses” it or not…She may believe otherwise, but her belief does not alter the fact that patriarchy — a social order predicated on an oppression to which she is already subject — is real and in effect and entirely beyond any unrestricted control she may wish to exert and only too glad to welcome her as a team player and sign her up for the rewards program.

Someday I’ll be that sharp.

Be afraid, be very afraid. Here, let us help.

Thursday, April 26th, 2007

Thursday is Anxiety Day at MSN!

For the women: is enjoying casual dates with more than one man at a time the same thing as spitting in the face of God? Possibly. You should let church peer pressure make that decision for you.

Just ask Suzanne Thomas (not her real name), who was dating two men until the folks at her church chided her for it. “They acted like I was doing something wrong,” she recalls. “Like I was sinning. I wasn’t sleeping with these men, I was just trying to figure out which one I liked best.”

Under pressure, she stopped seeing both of them and is now single. “I’ve joined the singles ministry and have decided from now on I’ll only date one man at a time. I’d rather do that than deal with the judgment.”

For the men, a real kick in the balls: Is your child really yours? No really. Have you checked?

After recently reviewing 67 studies on the subject, University of Oklahoma researchers found that PD (paternal discrepancy) rates tend to be much higher among men who have reason to believe there’s been more than one dog in the yard. No surprise there. But leave out these men and you end up with a number that can safely be assumed to represent the rest of us. That number is 3.85 percent. Another review of 19 studies by a group at Liverpool John Moores University backs this up, putting the figure at 3.7 percent of dads. It may not seem like a lot—until you do the math. According to a 2005 U.S. Census Bureau report, there are 27,940,000 fathers nationwide with a child under 18. That means over a million guys out there are taking care of some other man’s kid.

…If there’s any lesson here for a man, it’s this: The medical establishment is not on your side, the legal establishment may or may not be on your side, and you can be damn sure that the woman who lied to you isn’t on your side, which makes it all the more important that you stick up for yourself. More important, perhaps, asking a few painful questions in the beginning could save you—and the ones you love—a lot of pain later on. No man can be blamed for believing in the woman he loves. You can’t go into love doubting. But nor can you live without truth.


Wednesday, April 25th, 2007

It’s 2am, my closet is full of water, and my cat is peeing everywhere uncontrollably. Kinda seems like those 2 things could be related, yet they’re not. At least my emergencies present themselves with thematic coherence.

So close, yet so far away…

Monday, April 23rd, 2007

Remember when we all pitched in for that dead horse, labeled it “Rebeloution Modesty Survey” and then took turns beating it? Oh, that was fun.

But we haven’t heard from Sultry McHawt lately.

Ms. Sultry McHawt puts the sex-ay in modesty!

Let’s check in…hey look! A respected author and real role model has put in his two cents about the modesty survey, and he’s not afraid to take those horny boys to task about their own responsibility.

Girls are in a tough spot when it comes to modesty. They are called by God to dress modestly, but because they aren’t born with the same “visual nature” in their sexuality as guys are, it is difficult for women to spot where modesty begins and ends.

True enough, girls are in a tough spot when it comes to modesty. Their own boobies don’t really do anything for them, so sometimes they forget to tape them down firmly enough. But what is firmly enough, really? I’m not exactly sure how you could find out the answer to that question, but I bet it involves one lucky-fuck youth group and a lot of ace bandages.

As guys, we complicate it further by carelessly sinking to our own lowest levels sexually. Our visual nature first forces God to call women to modesty, depriving them of their freedom to define their own style of dress. While that is frustrating in its own way, their real frustration comes when we only pay attention to the girls in our youth groups that dress hot, while ignoring the ones who dress modestly and chase after God.

It’s your privilege and your right as men to create a ridiculous double standard that allows you to have something to practice besides that which you preach. Don’t let this schmuck take that from you!

Who can blame the girl who throws up her hands and snaps, I’m through worrying about this modesty thing! Their eyes are their problem, not mine! I certainly can’t blame them as long as we are being so lazy about it ourselves. We must take care of our own responsibilities first by disciplining our eyes and our minds to line up with scripture if we expect our women to line up in modesty. We are men. We must lead in all this.

Oh. My. God. He’s going to say it. He’s actually going to tell these boys (25% of whom agree with the statement “Sweatshirts (??!!!?) with messages across the front draw too much attention to the bust.) that they need to get a freaking grip. Oh, finally.

And that is what I love about the Modesty Survey. It allows guys to take some responsibility and leadership. We can honestly help train our sisters in Christ about where those boundaries lie and, hopefully, as we think through the issue ourselves, we can begin to stand up as men by joining the Rebelution against low expectations.

Emphasis mine, just to make sure you caught that, because I had to read it a few times before I believed it. But it’s true-an important step in controling your own lust and taking responsibility for your thoughts is training the women to stop being such stumbling blocks, what with their University sweatshirts and their walking and swimming just like they were people. And you can do this by holding a massive survey loaded with statements that even the Amish would find a bit prude and proving once and for all that no matter what she’s doing some guy somewhere finds it too hot to handle.

Rebeloutionettes: Seriously, if you need your red flags to be any redder, I don’t know what we can do. Oh, wait, yes I do. The quotes from the question “Immodest clothing is not a problem (for you) when a girl in your own family wears it.” pretty much tell you everything you need to know.

A young lady, regardless of your relation to her, can be a stumbling block/temptation to a young man. Sort of a disgusting thought, but men, if not walking in the Spirit everday, can be wolves.

My younger sister, 14, is just recently becoming more of a young lady. It was not too long ago that I (for the first time) had to bring up her dress to her. It’s not a question of incest. It’s a question of instinct. I could probably think for a moment and realize that it’s my sister, but why be put in that position in the beginning?

A girl is a girl. My sisters look like girls, and therefore they are potentially a temptation. Just because I have a relationship with them does not mean that their womanliness physically can not stir up wrong thoughts.

Even my Mom can attract my attention if she isn’t careful.

And if we need to be reminded that there will be no end to the modesty nitpicking, let’s listen to the 18-year-old responding to the question “Lifting a long skirt any higher than the knee in order to step over something is a stumbling block.”

For some reason, things that are covered and then revealed can often be a bigger mental trigger than something that was less covered to begin with. So yes, I’d say be careful not to lift above the knee.

Rebeloutionettes, I want you to listen to me just once. THERE IS NOTHING, NOT ONE SINGLE THING, THAT YOU CAN DO TO HELP A GUY WHO OPENLY ADMITS THAT EVEN HIS MOM CAN DO IT FOR HIM. Nothing you can wear, nothing you can say, no prayer that you can make, will do a damn thing for him until he decides to do something for himself. The incest taboo is one of the strongest taboos we ever learn, and we share it with virtually every society that ever existed anywhere at any time. If you’re hanging around a bunch of guys who are comfortable enough with their privilege to announce, ‘hey, when I look at my sister, I think, I’d tap that’ then the problem is not you and your Devil’s chunk heel shoes, it’s them, it’s THEM, OH MY GOD IS IT THEM. Don’t let anyone lump people like that into a sample population and then tell you that it is your responsibility to cater to that shit. It is not.

This is an important lesson, probably one of the most important, that feminists would like to give you, and that the patriarchy would like to bury. Sometimes, it’s just not your problem, and learning to recognize and enforce that boundary will save you a lot of heartache and give you the confidence you need to defend yourself when assholes like Fred Stoeker come around.

Rainbow Girl feeds the bears; they were so cute and it seemed so harmless.

Sunday, April 22nd, 2007

Note for the sarcasm impaired: I actually love Rainbow Girl’s post, just like everyone else. Jesus freakin’ crimeny, people.

I’m not sure if I’m at all pleased with this sparkling post of Rainbow Girl’s. I mean, here the rest of us are telling all the Nice Guys and MRAs that of course they too can have their own versions of Women’s Studies, or male domestic violence shelters, or colored-ribbon campaigns against sex-specific cancers, all they have to do is follow the lead of 70′s era feminists and organize, organize, organize, because today’s feminists sure as shit ain’t doing that work for them.

Then Rainbow Girl basically codifies concern trolling for them. She wrote them a freakin’ instruction manual. Great frickin’ job.

How to Talk to a Feminist.
Step one: Cite Essential Difference.
The conversation may have started on unequal pay, sexual violence, or discrimination, but it is your duty to immediately direct the conversation to the fact that women are inherently different from men. This first step is crucial, because everyone knows that essential difference legitimizes and therefore neutralizes oppression.
Step Three: Demand a Definition of Feminism and if Necessary, Provide One.
Step Six: Helpfully Suggest How To Be a Nicer Feminist.
Essentially, Step Six is about helping feminists make men feel more comfortable about living around misogyny-something that should undoubtedly be at the top of their agenda.

Ok, I’ll admit, it’s a really good instruction manual. Very appropriate, rather dead-on. But I’m still steamed.

Everybody be sure to stop by Rainbow Girl’s and read the whole thing, then thank her next time some guy is whining at you, “but I don’t wanna start a conscious-raising group for men to discuss how the system oppresses them and what long-term plans and activism can help change it, or spend decades building up a new area of scholarly research, I want you to do if for me and I want it right now! Why can’t you be more like Rainbow Girl? She helped us out!”

It wouldn’t be spring…

Saturday, April 21st, 2007

…in any of the neighborhoods I tend to rent in if I couldn’t hear the couple next door shouting at each other. At least this neighborhood has horsies.

But those people were real

Friday, April 20th, 2007

Around my office today, a lot of co-workers were wearing these:

It’s heartwarming to see Americans showing support and solidarity in the face of horrible tragedy. 33 people are dead as the direct result of senseless violence. It’s truly, deeply awful.

So I appreciate the folks who were wearing a ribbon. But I’m a little confused as to why they weren’t already wearing 21, 212 of them.

I guess 33 senselessly killed Iraqis aren’t worth a ribbon.

I wondered why I was seldom sexually harrassed on teh interwebs

Friday, April 20th, 2007

According to a Gender Genie, junk science is a woman, marc is a woman some of the time and a guy the rest of the time, and I appear to be all man.

H/t majikthise

I’ve been waiting all my life to hear this.

Friday, April 20th, 2007

Cocktails may make fruit healthier.

Adding ethanol — the type of alcohol found in rum, vodka, tequila and other spirits — boosted the antioxidant nutrients in strawberries and blackberries, the researchers found.

Keep up the good research, guys!

Out of control kids taking over America

Thursday, April 19th, 2007

Alarming exposé after the fold.