Females! Submit to your Biblically ordained roles or face a terrifying future as a bit part in a Polish film director’s 30 year old wankfest
Published by Kyso Kisaen April 17th, 2007 in Punkass!, Feminism, For the ladies, HUH!?, MoviesMrs Alexandra over at Homeliving Helper knows that feminists are out to destroy Western civilization. And we’re doing it by causing women to ‘forget’ that we actually like having to stroke a guy’s ego for 40+ years just to get some of those precious, precious resources. Doing this creates two new problems: one is girls are not being sufficiently trained to be all Victorian-like plus some guys are finding they like not having to worry that if they lose their jobs their wife and children will end up homeless, thanks to the wife’s income. Feminists hate these men, because feminists hate all men.
Well, Mrs Alexandra is out to tell you that men are wonderful. And we should be glad to serve them. And because feminists hate men so much, they’ve caused women to forget about how much better things were back in the day. And that chivalry is a privilege, not a right.
How many times does she have to tell you people this? It seems like it has been so many times. Will you not listen to Mrs Alexandra? Not even when she refers you to the learned words of Helen Andelin of Fascinating Womanhood fame? How about Britian’s newspaper of record, the Daily Mail? What about the Bible?
Ok, we can argue with Helen (and in fact, Mrs Alex does have a few bones to pick with her). We can dismiss the Daily Mail. We can even quibble a bit about the Bible, if our pastor says it’s OK. But there is one authority that no one can ignore, and today Mrs Alex was forced to bring out the big guns. That’s right, cult Polish soft-core sci-fi comedies.
I remember watching a film many years ago called Sexmission.[link added by me -K.K.] I don’t remember the story exactly but I think it was about a society after a nuclear war when nearly all men were killed and women built a matriarchy, which was totalitarian and fascistic. There were two men who survived and they were put to sleep or something, but when they woke up they set out on a mission to teach women about love and marriage. Women in the matriarchy were taught to hate men. They were shown parading in the streets and shouting “Man Is Our Enemy!!!” and taught that it was Adam who gave the apple to Eve in the garden, not vice versa.
It all happened in some bunker where women were kept by the matriarchy leaders lying to them that it was unsafe outside it. However, two women in the film fell in love with those two men, rejected matriarchy and ran out of the bunker to a free world. Like those women, we need to understand, that with some exceptions, a normal woman’s happiness consists in falling in love with a good man, marrying him, bearing children and taking care of the family. That’s how things have been since the Creation, that’s what most women want deep down in their hearts.
Men are not our enemy. Men are wonderful.
This is the future you wanted, feminists, and it is now. Look at it!
A serious study of a post-nuclear feminist world…and the lucky guys who get to tap that!
Two scientists are chosen as guinea pigs for a time experiment: they are placed in hibernation and should be brought back to life after three years. In the meantime, however, the World War III breaks out and life have been wiped out of the surface of the Earth. When they wake up, it turns out that not only 50 years have passed but also that they are the only living specimens of the male sex in a new, underground society composed exclusively of women. Max used to be woman-chaser so he finds himself in heaven. Albert, on the other hand, forgot all about love and sex as a serious scientist, but is willing to learn. So are the Amazons, who after a kiss turn into pliant kittens. The Council of Women is going to decide their fate, so they are trying to win more time. Eventually they make it to the surface, helped by beautiful Lamia. On the surface it turns out that there is life there and somebody has been living a decent life…
That’s right: in a future underground matriarchy, women will still train themselves to hate men, much like I spent most of last weekend training my boyfriend’s nephew to loathe the dodo bird like I loathe the dodo. Also, their head governing body will be called the Council of Women, just in case they forget. Can the two brave sets of masculine stereotypes fuck every mindbogglingly inept caricature of an angry feminist that made it to the underground pussy caves? We’ll find out as soon as I slog through the 30 other movies that are now ahead of this one on my netflix queue. As far as I can tell, most viewers respond well to the movie’s dire warning against the spectre of women’s lib, with one Amazon reviewer going so far as to declare it could “be very educational for kids.”
So, what are the odds that these beautful Amazons who need only a man to guide them hold high court in the sauna? Because that would be hot.
I love how Adam tempting Eve with the apple is held up as an example of what man-hating feminazis they are, but somehow they don’t take the next step and realize that Eve tempting Adam has been the quintessential misogynistic narrative for millennia.
The verdict:
DEATH BY SNOO-SNOO!
Snoo-snoo?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=snoo snoo&defid=362161
Oh. Glad I asked.
Since my comment to Mrs. Alexandra is obviously never going to make it out of moderation, I might as well post here what I have tried to say there:
Interesting. funny, the women I know who seem to understand me best (starting with my wife of 23 years and my mother) are all feminists. but then, so am I.
I certainly have never, ever been tempted to go looking for a woman who would talk so condescendingly about the “care and feeding of husbands”. That charming phrase suggests to me that if you are looking for women who are hostile towards men and hold them in contempt, you should look elsewhere than among feminists.
Yeah, they don’t like unsympathetic visitors over there.
So, women having equal rights and wanting to be treated like people is bad because it could potentially (though not very likely) lead to a society where women rule and men are oppressed.. right I see the light now.
Oh and lesbians don’t exist. Or women who don’t want to have children, or women who want children and love men but don’t really want to be married, or women who want to be, or are married with children but also have other things in their life that is important…..
I made the mistake of checking out Mrs. Alexandra’s post. Now my eyeballs are bleeding. Thanks a lot.
This story seems awfully familiar.
Shira- But that’s the point. They think the former version, with Adam as the seducer, is a feminist lie, while the latter version, depicting Eve as the evil one, is the literal truth revealed by God and actually cite that myth as hard-and-fast evidence, indisputable. They don’t see it as a narrative- they see it as history, something that actually happened.
Did her husband give her permission to talk? Why is Mrs Alexandra blogging instead of making him a sandwich?
Well, actually, not only did Mrs. Alexandra approve my comment, but she devoted several thousand words to viciously attacking my wife and my mother, finishing up by comparing them with Nazis.
That’s sure the way to show who is polite, civil and courteous.
Oh, I also liked the part where she said that testimony from people who have actually been there will never have any effect on her opinion.
Well, actually, not only did Mrs. Alexandra approve my comment, but she devoted several thousand words to viciously attacking my wife and my mother, finishing up by comparing them with Nazis.
Love their grasp of history. If there was any movement that was all about getting women out of the house and discouraging them from marriage and children, it was the National Socialist party of Germany circa 1940.
This may cause them to close comments again for awhile. If they don’t have time to moderate each comment personally, or if people harsh on their mellow too much, they shut them down. It’s why generally leave them alone unless they say something really mind-boggling. No need to send them running for cover over every last submission post, although it’s really tempting sometimes to analyze the patterns of some of Lydia’s posts. For example, even though they won’t admit that being home with the husband is anything short of bliss, Lydia has devoted quite a few posts to chasing away the blues and what she describes sounds a lot like “the problem with no name.”
Oh, and Mr Nice Guy, I don’t see the reference in urban dictionary to the joke Rainbow Girl was making. Her quote was from an episode of Futrarama, where the delivery crew makes a stop at the planet of women, and the men are sentenced to death by snoo-snoo, which turns out to be what the Amazonian women call sex. Eventually, the crew’s women save them while Bender discovers that the Oz-like leader of the Amazon women was actually a female robot who just needed a little bending.
I think the URL broke because of the space. By searching for “snoo snoo” I got an explanation of the reference.
I think it’s hilarious how she went back and made 6 long posts outlining quotes from radical feminists, then called feminism a hate group and compared it to the Nazis.
When domestic violence, rape and harassment against women stats go down, I’ll consider subscribing to her “men are wonderful” theory. This woman most likely blames rape victims for getting raped, and probably thinks that battered women don’t act submissive enough to their dear hubbies. “If they would only clean the house better, their husbands wouldn’t feel the need to beat them into their place.”
I have only pity for women like this. They are truly tools of their own oppression. Sad.
I just want to clarify that Mrs. Alexandra did not actually make that quote, that was me speculating how she might think about battered women based on her poor attitudes toward other women.
Thanks for clarifying on my behalf Kyso, I just assumed everyone is as much a Futurama addict as I am.
I just want to clarify that Mrs. Alexandra did not actually make that quote, that was me speculating how she might think about battered women based on her poor attitudes toward other women.
They generally have the class to preface that idea with something like, “while it’s true that there are some disturbed men out there, most of the time…”
Man, it must be exhausting to take so much out of context and not understand English. Those quotes about how feminists “hate me” are all easily refuted.
why ?
why must there always b 1 leader orr male orr female whats the deal with people why do feminists think im bad because i work for me and girlfriend too give us a good life too help eithother washing clothes and going out tugether and just because 1 guy rapes woman then the whole race is evil ? sow that means iff my girlfriend abbandons me and takes all my stuff the whole female race is evil ? i really dont get both sides why cant woman b next too males and males next too woman not above orr below whe only got 1 life after that its game over and whe need too work tugether male and female too make a good life the only thing i hate are muslims they only think male rules witch is not true no male orr female rule iff seen some pretty sick people statting that all males must b breeders putting them on pumps for seeds is that what woman truely want ? woman dont care about love about there own love about standing up with some 1 and see how beutiful the day is with some 1 next too you mayb you guys think im crazy now hahaha i am 20 years old and my other girlfriend died 5 years ago and sinds then i know why you need too help eithother in life whell i hope some 1 agrees with me
i am by the way an submissive guy but i treat people equel rather it is male female dogg cat orr what ever and what god wants is in your heart and head and what you do every day makes you a good orr bad person and i agree with mrs alexandra that feminist want too destroy the world disturbing ballance that is created now i hope males and females will find out that they need eithother for everything and the world will become a better place for males and females iff some 1 disagrees then they can mail me at g.stutz@hotmail.com i really want too know peoples oppinion of life greetings gerard from the netherlands
Basically look at it biblically and you will get all the answers you need. Its not about who is more dominate or “fighting for precious resources” love is all about sacrifice not which person in the relationship is getting more or less. Both males and females have important roles and things to bring to a relationship and the world. No that doesnt mean one is better then the other we are all equal its just each sex is equiped differently. Example, males are looked to to lead and be logical where clearly females are better emotionally and being sensitive. The only time there is an embalance of this is when a man lets his lust take over. It always said in the bible that females would be envious of men and look women today find themselves in a compition with men about leadership and power, funny….. we still lead that category because you compare yourselves to men and equality to men, so technically the man is still the leader and trend setter. I wish men would stop having an identity crises and remember there roles as men and clearly open there eyes.