Congress sniffs our national teen panties, declares them sullied
9 Comments Published by punkass marc April 13th, 2007 in Sex, Ze Goggles! Zey Do Nothing!File under “no doy:”
Students who took part in sexual abstinence programs were just as likely to have sex as those who did not, according to a study ordered by Congress.
Also, feel free to file this under “creepy old pervs,” as I’m a smidge uncomfortable with Congressional inquiries into teenage sexual habits. Maybe I’m still having Foley hangovers, but I’d prefer we keep our lawmakers’ noses out of the national teen crotch.
Back to the matter at hand, though. Along with the sky being blue and oil companies screwing us out of every dime, I’m pleased to learn abstinence ed doesn’t work. Because, really, we had _no_ idea.
But I’m sure the sexphobes will claim their cause was not lost. No doubt these kids at least learned the ‘value’ of monogamy and how easily you achieve richer sex with one partner forever.
Also, those who attended one of the four abstinence classes that were reviewed reported having similar numbers of sexual partners as those who did not attend the classes.
Oh. Well. Uh, I’m sure these kids at least waited to get busy until later in life, when something called maturity is rumored to set in.
And they first had sex at about the same age as other students — 14.9 years, according to Mathematica Policy Research Inc.
Okay, so maybe nothing about abstinence ed works very well, but whatever the churches out there wanna spend their money on is their garsh darn bidness.
The federal government now spends about $176 million annually on abstinence-until-marriage education.
Criminy. So when do liberals get to point the finger at wingnuts and mercilessly tease them for decades about their useless tax-and-spend social programs? Because last I checked, they were the only people subsidizing hugely profitable companies, paying for broken abstinence programs, and funding an unjust war with our future’s money.
At least they got the message about this program not being worth it.
Officials said one lesson they learned from the study is that the abstinence message should be reinforced in subsequent years to truly affect behavior.
Sigh. Only in America would we examine our expensive, pointless, ineffective anti-sex teen brainwashing campaign and decide we need to double our efforts and continue them into adulthood.
9 Responses to “Congress sniffs our national teen panties, declares them sullied”
- 1 Pingback on Apr 17th, 2007 at 7:08 pm
Somebody hasn’t heard the old phrase, “The definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
So the kids get the abstinence only message all throughout middle & high school, the average age for first fuck is 15 (holy crap, was I behind that curve) and the problem is that they don’t market abstinence past high school? Kids must grow up so fast these days, back when I was a youngster you didn’t graduate until you were almost 18.
I think they should do a study to see whether it’s true that the more sexual partners you have, the more likely you are to use birth control responsibly (i.e., practice makes perfect) and if, as I suspect, there is a positive correlation, we should lobby for promiscuity-only sex education.
I suspect in a few years, abstinence-only proponents will be saying that we need to add mandatory chastity belts to the curriculum to work.
Fucking for virginity…
OWW!!! That hurt… Maybe hitting myself in the head again won’t hurt…
OWW!!! That hurt… Maybe hitting myself in the head again won’t hurt…
OWW!!! That hurt… Maybe hitting myself in the head again won’t hurt…
…
*THUD*
Impeach? Shit, put them in a museum!!! Little plaque below cage: “The Bush administration. Wasters of massive amounts of money and huge numbers of lives. DANGER: Do not approach the cage and keep your unborn fetuses away from the railling as they will be taxed and forced into government servitude and forced to work for literal peanuts cleaning some pasty white ‘Bush base’ ultra-rich, homophobic racist asshole’s house.”
The same people who call for “abstinence-only” in education also routinely attack any attempt to increase funding for the general education system because that’s just “throwing money at the problem.”
Actually it’s because the money isn’t being thrown at them… But sometimes I state the obvious…
Just to point out.. The Church ain’t the only thing paying for this abstinence bullshit. The government’s making US the citizen pay millions in tax money to feed kids this bullshit!! I’m glad it doesn’t work, but it doesn’t work and that’s money down the crapper, nice!!
Aw, well. Nice work here BTW, and keep it goin’!!!