Non-Prostitution Post
Published by McBoing August 22nd, 2006 in Meat!, Memes, We Eat|
You Are Duck |
 Exotic and unusual, you are a bit of a rare bird - literally. You’re known for being soft and succulent, though at times you can be a bit greasy. |
Gross.
List of ingested items that do not make me sick: vegetables, coffee, booze, Jell-o. My stomach loves me, my intestines are pissed off. Duck is a no-no.
In other news, someone out there is elated that I’m ill because it gives him the opportunity to rail against The Left.
To wit:
The defining characteristic of the people on your side is just so hilarious, that tremendous contrast between your grand plans to rearrange the whole society and your total inability to successfully manage even your own lives, making you helplessly drift from one personal crisis to another.
And I don’t even feel bad about laughing at this. Next to what you guys did during the twentieth century, killing about a hundred million people and condemning billions of others to live under a tyranny of poverty and misery that we can’t even imagine today, nothing that I could ever do would amount to much more than a bite of a flea.
Do note, dear sir, that I didn’t ask for a handout, I asked for an IV bag to rid myself of the bother so I can, you know, work. Isn’t that better than asking for free healthcare and food stamps? I personally took the Republican message to heart. I didn’t just get myself one job to pay the bills, man, I got two, and I’m patiently waiting these nine months to receive health care benefits for myself and my family while I work 14-16 hour days. I’m a Republican wet dream.
Marketable degree? Got it. Bootstraps? Got ‘em too. Favorable economy? That’s on you and yours, man, along with the black heart it takes to laugh at people with health problems. Compassion? I’ll give you a bit of mine. It appears you need it, dollface.
Pork loin. Wait, I have to take a test?
That’s an unfortunate result for someone in your current state. No one ever says, my stomach is all fucked up. Maybe a little duck will calm it down.
I’m totally tofu. But I’m also all about the tuna. So, wev. Also, McBoing, I hope things are going okay for you, man.
Also, FUCK ILKKA, THAT STUPID SON OF A BITCH!!!! I hope he reads this, because he deserves this: YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE! GO TO HELL!
Watch out, dude. Yelling makes me barf.
I’m just mad that Ilkka’s name is ONE LETTER OFF from my pseudonym. And that he’s an asshole. Please, don’t anyone confuse me with that asshole, because normally I am only an asshole to assholes who deserve it, like that asshole Ilkka.
I did shy away from a couple of your comments at Feministe, ilyka, before I learned to recognize the difference. I don’t know that I can apologize profusely enough.
Also, “Loki on the run” is a fetid little piece of excrement. What the hell, man.
Hold on here. This blog is going from making fun of Dawn Eden to making fun of Ilkka Kokkarinnen? You’re skipping a few steps in the “making fun of stuff that’s increasingly less and less important to anything that matters” scale. Get it right. It’s:
-Dawn Eden
-Pablo the troll
-Anthony Kennerson
-David Thompson
-Other men besides Anthony Kennerson who bravely stand up to defend women’s right to blow them as said right is increasingly threatened by feminists
-Paul Begala
-The week-old grilled cheese sandwich I threw out yesterday
-Hootie and the Blowfish
-Dawn Eden again by the time you make it this far down the list
-People who still have Geocities pages
-Dryer lint
-Ilkka Kokkarinen
Dude, Dryer lint can fucking set the house on fire. It should be at least 4-5 steps above ilkka. I would add “rotten meat” somewhere on that list between Paul Begala and Hootie. And “Fishy sushi” too.
Someone should hook Ilkka Kokkarinen with Jacqueline Mackie Paisley Passey. They sound like they’d get along brilliantly.
Aw, Jackie Mackie. He’d make her an awesome footstool.
Y’all do know that Ill-kka is posting from Mississauga, Ontario, correct?
You know, land where he gets to snipe at McBoing for not having health care while he’s getting his fucking hemorrhoids treated out of the taxes of railroad widows?
Or maybe that’s his acne rosacea. Hard to tell with that guy.
Wow, that guy is disturbingly smug over the fact that you can’t eat and can’t get a doctor to tell you why you can’t eat. I also like how he mockingly suggested you put your money where your hippie mouth is and get acupuncture or move to Cuba as though you have ever said you hate Western medicine and we’d all be better off substituting MRIs with aromatherapy and moving to Communists islands.
Hey, Canada based fuckwit - when we bitch about our healthcare system, it’s YOUR country we hold up as a model of what we’d like to have. Now go have your vapors over our out-of-control leftism, and the next time you start puking uncontrollably come on down here and “manage” yourself some healthcare. Let’s see how good you’d do without a massive social saftey net.
And I notice it didn’t take too many comments for someone to pull out “It’s your own damn fault for not majoring in my major,” as though some jobs are worthy of healthy insured workers and the rest of the slime can deal with what they get. That’s what you get for being a former social worker, McBoing! If you really loved yourself, you’d have been a lawyer. An accountant lawyer stockbroker astronaught. Because fuck social workers. And fuck customer service personnel. Those people are hardly human.
I hope he moves to the U.S., loses his health insurance and gets cancer and dies. He’ll love it, because it means he’s right.
To do that, you’d have to start hating on poor people, blaming them for everything that went wrong in your life, and accusing them of being lazy and stupid for not being able to do what you did.
No, Thomas, that’s what they want to do themselves, not what they want their proles to do.
js, they need a few Horatio Alger stories to disguise the class war that is Republican governance.
Yeah, good point. Pretty soon they’ll start expecting illegal immigrants to bitch about how unsafe our borders are.