Try lowering your volume a little. It’s possible that the women you try to hit on in bars are ignoring you because they can’t hear you, but a not insignificant number of them might just be hoping you’ll stop shouting at them and go away.

As you do not know me, or much about me as a whole, really, I do not see why you get to make those assumptions. I was trying to understand, via Delphyne, why or why not, how or how not, if we could find something perhaps not “in common”, a way to understand things that are different from our own views. Hey, if my stances and thoughts and views offend you, fine, but insulting me, here and elsewhere, is not going to change or improve much of anything.

It’s interesting what you say about your upbringing - I was brought up in a supposedly liberal household where sex wasn’t supposed to be taboo and things like porn were viewed as fine. It seems to me that that, rather than being an escape from the sexual repression of the past however that was simply another manifestation of it.

“I think people who can’t differentiate between sex and other acts probably are disassociated from their bodies. It’s hardly sexual liberation to reduce sex to being like picking lettuces or adding up a column of numbers, it’s also untrue. Once again, women treating sex as a chore or work is standard practice for patriarchy. As antiprincess will probably agree, lots of housewives can confirm this.”

Hum, interesting theory. I can say I was raised to think the human body was an amazing machine (family of jocks, sports were a big deal), capable of amazing things and beautiful to behold…but I can also say I was raised to think that sex was something done by married straight people, and only married straight people, and for a long time I bought into that. Then I actually had sex (not married, oh well) and realized I thought that was a load of crap. I don’t really think I am disassociated from my body, in fact, quite the opposite, but everyone can have theories. I find the body, sex and sexuality in a vareity of forms simply fascinating and fascinating to explore, to experience, and to understand…and I suppose looking at it that way, emotional connection is completely secondary to the physical primary.

To answer your questions antiprincess, we’re not born neutral, we’re not born without boundaries but boundaries can be worn down or destroyed by sexual abuse, as has happened to many women in prostitution and porn. For example it’s not a coincidence that Jenna Jameson was raped and gang-raped before going into porn or Linda Marchiano had to be raped and beaten by Chuck Traynor to get her to do what he wanted.

It’s a difficult subject to talk about because even mentioning it can retraumatise people but we can’t ignore it.