Since our hit count has skyrocketed thanks to the obsession over Tamara Hoover, I figured a saucily-titled follow-up would ensure maximum pr0n addict traffic thanks to the power of google.
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Before we proceed, now that I have trapped them here, I’d like to remind said addicts that this teacher is a real person, not a masturbatory object of lust, and that her photo work was fueled by artistic intentions, not a desire to get off anyone harboring an intense fetish for the thought of a NUDE TEACHER. If you want to see one so badly, try asking one out instead of obsessing over the exploited photos of Tamara Hoover.
This has been a test of the emergency pr0n addict alert system. If this had been a real emergency, this broadcast would have been followed by an animated gif of two women kissing.
Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
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I taught at a high school briefly, and let me assure you that this interaction would have resulted in my immediate release and possibly the filing of criminal charges against me:
Johnny: Hi Mr. Punkass! I know where you can see nude photos on the internet!
Mr. Punkass: Wow, Johnny, that’s cool. Good for you.
[a few days pass]
Mr. Punkass: Actually, Johnny, could we look at those photos together?
Johnny: You bet! Point me to a keyboard.
Mr. Punkass: Here you are, lad, use this school computer and show me a naked lady.
Johnny: There she is, breasts and all. Enjoy!
Yet, for vengeance-minded Gayle Andrews, these actions managed to put her co-worker on the termination track instead of her:
Hoover and fellow art teacher Gayle Andrews had argued for most of the school year over a kiln, according to Andrews’ signed affidavit. After a confrontation on May 15, students told Andrews that they knew how to get Hoover in trouble and told Andrews to look at pictures on a photo-sharing Web site. Andrews said she initially ignored the information but asked a student to show her the site a few days later.
So thanks to her own affadavit, we now have confirmation that Ms. Andrews asked a student to use school property so that together they might view pictures of a nude woman. I fully endorse Tamara’s right to participate in this art, but I don’t think she ought to be encouraging students to see it. She didn’t, of course; that would be Ms. Andrews doing the encouragement.
So we have one teacher about to be fired for performing legal consensual acts on her own time off school property while the colleague who asked a student to pull up her nude photos at school gets off scot free. If Ms. Andrews had been told there was a peephole into the staff showers, would she ask the student where it was and if they could view Tamara Hoover together? God, there are a million ways to reframe this, and all of them are rather damning of Gayle Andrews.
Remind me not to pick any fights about kilns with her. If my nude pictures got out, our hit counts would _really_ shoot through the roof.
[making kissy face, rubbing own nipple, winking at you]
Do we all have to post nude pics when the hits go down? Because I’m going to need some photoshoppin’ time. Or possibly some tasteful, artistic black-and-whites done, and summer is a bad time to try and get a photojournalism student from the college.
Don’t worry, K! We’re feminists here, we accept women’s bodies as they are, not as the patriarchy tells us they should be! (I, on the other hand, would be forever shamed if it turned out that Gerald McBoing’s cock was bigger than mine.)
[making kissy face, rubbing own nipple, winking at you]
I’ll grab my camera.
I, on the other hand, would be forever shamed if it turned out that Gerald McBoing’s cock was bigger than mine.
I alwasy imagine that, with a name like “mcboing”, it would be sort of springy and curled, like a tigger tail.
If only so that he can have tiger stripes painted all over his body, stick it between his legs and bounce around naked at parties saying “wohohoho, a tiger’s a wonderful thing!”
I’ve gotta stop day dreaming so fucking weird while at work.
A springy, coiled, Tiggerish cock is just the sort of thing we need to win over some of the hardcore Anti-BJists.
Initial attempts at finding Nude Punkass Marc picture have turned up a surprising result:
If my nude pictures got out, our hit counts would _really_ shoot through the roof.
Dude, I don’t think so. In the photo I’ve seen, your ass is just a little bit above a block of ice.
So McBoing is in a bar one day, so he told me, and after about four beers he decides to visit the pisser. He’s standing at the urinal, and Thomas walks in and says “Hey, McBoing, I didn’t know you had your dick tatted!” McBoing shrugs. “Yeah, got it a couple years back. Someone paid me to.” “That’s cool,” says Thomas, looking at it kinda sidelong from the next urinal. “But why would someone pay you to tattoo the word “STUD” on your schlong?”
“That’s just what you can see when I’m limp,” says McBoing. “It actually says “THADDEUS McINERNY’S STUDEBAKER SALES AND REPAIR SERVICES, LTD., CEntral9-4500″
Chris Clarke, ladies and gentlemen. He’s here all week.
I admit it. R. Mildred and I are lovers. She’s not imagining anything.
But does she… you know… “legitimize the patriarchy?” If you know what I mean and I think you do.
Chris, I’m guessing R. likes to “introduce a different paradigm.” Which would mean I’m jealous of Gerald again. Damn.