when the status quo frustrates.

Seinfeld Episode X

Well, that was weird. I woke up in the middle of the night last night giggling about a random Seinfeld moment. You know the one:

———

Clearly bored, Jerry and George are playing cards at Jerry’s table. Elaine enters and drops down on the back of the couch between the two guys. [This would be the "just right" Elaine -- before she became the overly slick tanning booth addict yuppie but after she dropped the wall of hair and grandma dresses.]

ELAINE
Say what you want about me, but I’m
always good for a story.

Jerry and George look up expectantly, hoping for a good one.

ELAINE
I’ve got a digital pen.

[A beat.]

JERRY
And?

ELAINE
And what? That doesn’t strike you as odd?

JERRY
Sure it does, but that’s not a story.
Did you find the pen? Was it given to you?
Those would be stories. Perhaps you used
it to fend off a mugger in the park. That
would be a story.

ELAINE
Fine. It’s an anecdote.

George looks at his analog watch as Jerry’s about to have a cow.

GEORGE
What time does the pen have?

Elaine extracts the pen and checks it.

ELAINE
6:05.

GEORGE
[slaps the table]
I knew it! What’s it doing? It’s
synchronized with some satellite in
space, isn’t it? I’m running around
8 minutes late to everything –
no clue — and the rest of the world’s
in lock step thanks to digital pens.
That’s just great!

———

Yeah, not their best moment, but Elaine’s flat delivery of “I’ve got a digital pen” cracks me up every time. At least, it would have if it had ever actually been part of a real episode. It took me like ten minutes before I realized I’d dreamt the whole scene.

It’s nice to know I’m every bit as capable of hackery in my sleep as I am on my feet.

4 Responses to “Seinfeld Episode X”

  1. Magnus Malmborn says:

    Seek help, now ;)

  2. Ezra says:

    I have to admit, reading that, I thought I half-remembered it from a Seinfeld episode as well…

  3. Auguste says:

    Ezra,

    I was having that issue too. Then I realized I was mixing it up with the Jack Klompus Astronaut Pen debacle.

    Still, it’s better than the Puerto Rican day episode.

  4. Auguste says:

    PM’s scene is better than the PR day episode, I should clarify.

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